Simplify: Be Content in Circumstances

What is Contentment?

Here's the definition according to Webster's

Contentment-

1) Mentally or emotionally satisfied with things as they are

2) Assenting to or willing to accept circumstances, a proposed course of action, etc.

I have to be honest here, I almost titled this post as Simple Mom Confessions. The reason I am blogging on contentment is because I really needed to practice it yesterday and I wasn't...at all!! As I continue to pray for God's guidance and purpose for this blog, as I am praying for guidance in all areas of my life right now, these thoughts, concepts, and words kept coming to mind.

Live Contently, Simply, & Fully

After the rough day I had yesterday (they were mostly self inflicted rough spots) I really wanted to seek God first this morning. Contentment is what He put on my heart and truly what I believe He wants me to share with you today.

I am finding the key to a simple life is fine tuning the art of contentment. If I seek contentment in all areas of my life then I stop spending money on things I want and don't really need, and I get off the hamster wheel of never having enough time in the day to accomplish all I want to and I learn to see my trials as a tool to help me be even more content.

I had to stop and access what areas of my life I needed to apply contentment. So I decided that over the course of the next few days I will share what I'm finding and what the Lord is showing me. The first area I know I need to practice contentment in is:

Stress (Circumstances)

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or want. Phillipians 4:11-12

Consider it pure joy...whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. James 1:2

Now if Paul, who was imprisoned when he wrote this, can find contentment in all things then that's what I should strive for with God's help. This is where I struggle. I find it easier (this is me personally)to be content with money/material things and my time than I do in this area.

It's those little moments of the lost shoe when you're running late, the twentieth time of putting my toddler in time out, or the meal plans gone bad (see homemade tortilla photo). In those moments whatever is happening right then and there seems magnified and I even justify my exploding temper and outburst of frustration.

The Lord is slowly revealing to me that when I allow my anger to get the best of me I'm saying that I don't deserve this, this is unfair,etc. However, God is opening my eyes to if I believe His promises like Joshua 1:5, 1 Corinthians 10:13& Romans 8:28 then these trials, no matter how big or small, are for my betterment.

My betterment? I certainly wasn't thinking that after 5 months of moving from Indiana (where I call home, grew up there, family is there) to Florida, then getting settled in there and getting used to the beach life to be told "Guess what Honey? I've been offered a job in Kansas!" was for my betterment. But after being here for 3 weeks I can honestly say that I am better for it.

My faith has grown beyond anything I thought possible. My appreciation for my husband and my family as a whole is deeper. My prayers in other areas have been answered as a result to the move. The bottom line here is that I am on the road to contentment (which ultimately leads to simplifying) through circumstances I never would have asked to happen if it were up to me!

C.S. Lewis said "If you think of this world as a place intended simply for our happiness, you find it quite intolerable: think this world as a place of training and correction and it's not so bad."

*Disclaimer: Please read this post with discretion. I am in no way suggesting you stay in a volatile situation where yourself or someone else is in harm's way. The trials I am speaking of here are the everyday, minor annoyances I allow to be much bigger than they should. If you are struggling with a more serious trial that is ongoing, harmful or desturctive, please pray and seek the help and advice of a pastor, counselor, family member, etc.

Hockey Game

I wanted to post these sooner but just haven't gotten around to it. I have pictures from a hockey game we went to this past Saturday night. Eian was really looking forward to it since it was just the three of us. We all love having my niece live with us but have come to value one another more. Our time seems a little more limited to spend with just Eian since a busy toddler has come into our lives!
I wasn't sure how I would like hockey but I have to say it was quite entertaining. I was very thankful for the seats we had. We had a perfect view... not too far away BUT not too close to the action and have little ears hear colorful language! There were a few heated confrontations to say the least. It was funny when Eian asked where they were making the two guys who just fought go. David explained it was a penalty box. That was my opportunity to say, " See bud, even grown men have time outs!" My son then preceded to say, "Mooom, they're not full grown. They're probably only like 16 so it's okay for them to have time outs. They're technically still kids." Little does Eian know that in just a few (too short) years he will claim and protest that he IS fully grown at 16! Oh, David and I laughed our head's off later on that one!
We had a great time and are so grateful for the free tickets our friend gave us. Thanks Aaron!

Looking Forward to 2009

Since I did a post on Looking Back to 2008 I thought it was appropriate to include a post of what my goals are for the new year. I've never been great at making or keeping resolutions but I do think it's important to evaluate where you've been the previous year and see what you might like to improve for the next year, especially spiritually.

So my "resolutions" (I prefer to call them goals) this year are focused on prioritizing my life the way God designed it and resting in Him to help me be the woman He's designed me to be.

1.) He first and foremost designed me to walk with Him in a close personal relationship. He is always there ready to forgive and ready to speak to me through His Word. I however, am not always so attentive. Sometimes my actions, or lack there of, don't necessarily say "I love you Lord". So I have a few things I've been convicted of that I can do to bring me closer to my Lord and Savior.

I, like many of us who strive to walk closely with Him, neglect & forget the opportunities God has given us to speak with Him because of the death of His son.. I need to work on my prayer life and plan to to read a book soon making my prayers more powerful and heart felt instead of going through the motions. I'm up for suggestions if anyone knows of a good Biblically sound one. The next is finally reading through the Bible. I have maybe 10 books to go and then I'd like to start reading the Bible chronologically. The third thing I'd like to do to improve my relationship with Him is keep a prayer and blessings journal. I think being able to see where God has answered my prayers will also help me pray more boldly.

2.) My second most important relationship is my husband. David and I have been through a lot this past year and it's been a blessing in disguise. We realized our strengths and weaknesses in our marriage. We also have come to really appreciate one another more. So one of the things I'm doing to be a better wife to Him is to finish the book , The Love Dare. We're also starting to read The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace in my women's accountability group. I've learned from The Love Dare, The Bible, and Christian friends that I can't expect my husband to change if I'm not first willing to change. I also shouldn't expect my husband to change just because I am. I should focus on the knowledge that I'm changing and growing to be a better wife is not for my husband but for the Lord. This has made a huge difference in our marriage this past year. The timing couldn't have been any better either. I mean what man would be encouraged after he loses his job by a wife who's nagging at him and just waiting for failure? That was the old me but slowly she is dissolving, thanks to God!

The other thing I plan to do to strengthen my marriage is to make sure we have a date night at least once a month. With two kids, working opposite shifts, and dealing with a tired pregnant body there isn't much "Us" time. Therefore some issues that may seem small at the time turn into mountains once time goes by and then when you are together you don't want to spoil the mood by bringing up old stuff and the cycle just goes on and on. I'm really looking forward to spending some quality time with David. If anyone has cheap date night ideas I would love to hear them. That's the biggest hurdle... What do you do on a low budget?

3.) My third relationship I will work on nurturing this year is with my handsome boy.

I've been really feeling convicted of not making more of point to help bring my son closer to the Lord. I feel like I have my relationship with the Lord and he has his but it's normally not something we share together. Keep in my mind I'm still a "baby" Christian in a way. I think God has been working on me these three years pruning me and making me ready to where I can now pass what I've learned to Eian. So I have been getting him up early and we spend time reading a few verses that Eian usually picks out and then discuss their significance and what he thinks God wants us to learn from the verses. You can see he really looks forward to it when he jumps out of bed when I mention devotions. It just fills my heart to see his enthusiasm!

I also want to spend more time being a teacher to him. I would love more than anything to home school but God just has not made a way for my husband to solely provide for us at this time. So I have resolved to making the most of the time God has given me with Eian now. Eian and I plan to pick one country a month to study, study their culture, language, geography, and food. We'll then pick a weekend to cook something from that country. He's really looking forward to that and so am I.

Well I know I have my work cut out for me but I am keeping my focus on the Lord and He will be my helper. I can't wait to get to started!

Looking Back at 2008

Awww.... it's good to be back in blogworld. I missed you all! I've actually had some time recently to visit a few of my favorite blogs. My girl Alexis over at Tales From the Back Acher inspired me by listing the happenings of their family for each month last year.

I however can barely remember what I had for breakfast! I thought it would be nice though to review at least the highlights (some good, some bad) from last year and be able to look back and see how the Lord's been working in our lives. So here goes....

January- The company I work for got a fresh start in a new building. We moved in Christmas Eve and spent most of January getting settled in.

February- My Avon business continued to take off and I won a $$$ prize for being a top recruiter. (please don't think I'm bragging because I get humbled by the Lord, see the review in May!)

March- We had a wonderful low cost swimming party for Eian's birthday with a Pokemon Pikachu cake and all for under $40! Woo Hoo!










April- I start to feel convicted of making Avon way too much of a priority and neglecting my family while still working my full time job.

My van poops out on me after being so faithful after 4 years, 250,000 miles and only $1800! My hubby's the master at good car deals.

My big Sis and her best friend from Florida come for a visit to go mushroom hunting, yeah it had NOTHING to do with me! I know, I know my family's twisted to drive 4 states to go mushroom hunting!

May- I feel a mild depression coming on from continued stress, pressure, and hopes of having more hours in the day!

A good friend of mine invites me to my first women's retreat. I go, reluctantly because off all my piling obligations. I went, was convicted that my walk with the Lord wasn't what He wanted it to be, repented and let go of so many things, and felt completely renewed and confident of what God wanted me to do. The bottom line... I wasn't trusting God to make a way for me to be a stay at home mom. Instead, I was trying to do it on my own and hurting myself and my family in the process. So the next day I called my Avon boss and quit the leadership program! I have never looked back and my family is so much better for it, thank you God!

June- We attended our annual company outing to the Indianapolis Indians baseball game.
My husband loses his job =0(

My husband's car ALSO poops out. Ironic timing huh?

I feel like the Lord asked me to mention to our church in having our own retreat. Little did I know that the one who mentions an idea at church is the one who heads it up! he, he A lesson learned!

July- I am really trying to remember something from July but I am totally drawing a blank!

Oh, I do know that my husband was still job searching! It was slim pickens job wise around here though and still is.

August- My little man enters the second grade!



Month three of no employment for my husband but he keeps his spirits up and finds a little work here and there.

We continue to trust God with finances and try to re-pay Him by seeking to be better stewards with the money He does give us. So we enroll in a free biblically based money management class at a local church.

September- Hooray, David finds a job! Praise the Lord!

We were given emergency custody of our little niece temporarily.

David decides to take a semester off from school to focus on helping me with the new changes in our world. Plus, I think he needed a break!

October- It was a busy month of trying to adjust to having another little person in our house. Everyone's getting along great though but are struggling with my niece's separation anxiety.

On Halloween our niece was removed from our home temporarily. It was a very scary, confusing, infuriating, but humbling time for all of us. My trust level in the Lord went sky high after this ordeal. Once again, praise God... even for the trials!

November- We're pregnant and thrilled!

We have a scare with my brother as he allows himself to get entrapped by his old ways. We continue to care for his daughter as he is placed in a treatment facility.

Myself and a friend at church begin the retreat sign up.

December- Busy, Busy, Busy but full of blessings! We took part in our churches Living Nativity again, Christmas for Everyone, took cookies to the women's shelter, attended both kids' Christmas programs, and my sister's family came in from Florida!

My brother seems to be thriving with his new program.

God provides for us for Christmas! We continue to struggle to get caught up financially from the job changes earlier in the year. My son got just enough goodies though but we only spent $50 on him! Our wonderful deacon gave us much needed but not asked for and completely unexpected help! We also had a friend of ours who cleaned out her son's room who just so happened to have unopened games and toys buried in his closet in which she gave to us. Well atleast that was her story. Thanks Andrea and Aaron!

Well there you have it. I'm sure I'll think of more highlights after I post this but I think I did pretty good for my memory! What I think is so awesome as I look back at our year is God's awesome faithfulness ( I plan to do a future post dedicated to this attribute of His). I honestly do not think I could have gotten through all of the trials and changes that happened without the Lord. Did anyone notice that all of the trials (except for the van pooping out in April) happened after I re-committed myself in May at the retreat? God is amazing! He is now blessing me and my family in so many ways with the baby, assiting my brother with his daughter and getting to witness to him, the joy of being involved with our own churches' retreat, and learning the lesson of trusting God is also trusting my husband to be the leader in our home and be a better helper to him. Thank you Lord!

I can't wait to see what God has in store for us in 2009!

Home Invasion!

HELP, WE'RE BEING INVADED!

Living in the country has it's perks. The perks are not as noticeable however, when the weather turns chilly. This means we get all kinds of little "roommates" whether we like it or not. A few weeks I woke up to an awful scratching, clawing sound right outside my window. I kept banging on the wall and it would stop, for a minute, and then the persistent clawing continued until it eventually ceased. The next morning I'm guessing what ever "it" was the morning before, finally found a way in as I heard the horrid sound of sharp nails on metal from our heat and air vents in our crawl space.

Then, this week we've had 3 mice that we know of, all of which we've caught. We're not mice lovers by any means (Ohhh, trust me on this one!) but our son begged us not to hurt the poor creatures. So... for some unknown reason we thought it a good idea to just toss the mouse out in the front yard! We've probably been chasing the same stinkin mouse all week! I think his time was up tonight though if it's the same one. Yep, Mr. Frisker's chased the mouse under the sofa, my husband tipped over the sofa so he could shew the mouse out, but he wasn't there. We looked everywhere in the living room and started to give up. Hubby lowered the couch back down and there it was... one small crushed mouse. Eeewww, nasty! I think I need to go sanitize my sofa cushions now. Oh I can't wait until the little vermin hibernate, so bring on the cold weather! Wait, DO mice hibernate?

Lessons In Love- Be Transparent

So I found another blog that hosts Lessons In Love Saturdays. Yes it's becoming a sickness, blogofever! This one is yet another great tool for me though to honor my husband

and the Lord by sharing what I have learned from my three years married, but nearly nine years total with my wonderful man!

This week's topic for me is to be transparent. We continue to hear that a secret to a great marriage is that yucky word for us who are challenged in this, yep you guessed it....Communication!!! One thing I've learned in my own marriage is that I can't expect my husband to communicate with me if I'm not open and honest with him, hence being transparent.

So what does being transparent look like in a marriage? A wise pastor's wife at church told me if I want to honor God by being a Godly wife I have to help my husband be the leader. Most men I've been told, have a built in or God given desire to lead, but that desire diminishes each time a wife criticizes, belittles (even if you think you're just joking, it's not a joke to him), continually nags (which really means you don't have faith in or no trust in your husband) or under appreciates her husband.

A way to nurture his God given desire to lead is by being his biggest supporter and helper. Ironically enough one of the best ways, my pastor's wife told me, to help him to lead is by showing him how to help you. Weird huh? Now I'm not talking help as in having him do your honey do list! I'm talking emotionally and then yes we're back to my point of being transparent. Most men cannot confidently lead his wife if he doesn't feel he knows what makes her tick. If he doesn't really know his wife then he'll be less likely to be secure in making big decisions in the home. He may feel as if he'll be criticized by you and so on.

So see ladies... Our men feel secure when we gently help them to see what we need from them which makes us better helpers! I sure hope I didn't just confuse everyone and if I did, then just shoot me an email.

Happy Communicating!

My Husband Rocks-Taking Charge!

Okay, so I know it's not Friday but I really wanted to participate in this. I stumbled upon

Katy Lin's blog, who started My Husband Rocks Fridays! I thought, what a great idea! Learning to appreciate and support my husband positively is an area the Lord has been asking me to grow in. This is a great tool to help me get there. Each Friday you list an attribute of your husband that you're thankful for that day or from the week and how it impacts you and your family.

I would like to say My Husband Rocks in growing to be a better leader of our home! My husband will tell you that he and I are not on the same level spiritually and admits he still has a lot of growth. But really though, who is ever done growing, spiritually? I know that I am definitely a work in progress. So therefore he really, until recently, didn't quite understand God's role for him as a husband in the area of leadership in our home. To my hubby's defense, it doesn't help matters to have a wife who can be overbearing and has the "Oh, just let me do it!", attitude. I am thankful that the Lord is also working on my role as his wife which includes having a gentle spirit who helps him to lead.

So anyway, the past two week's have been very trying with multiple family issues and to top things off, our septic tank backed up in our tub and toilets! Talk about NASTY! David handled it like a champ though. The old David probably would have gotten very angry and maybe even put it off and procrastinated until he got tired of bathing and doo dooing at someone else's house. Nope, he was calm. cool, and collected! he made all the phone calls, shopped around for the best price(I was so proud), asked my Dad to find and dig up the septic cover, and cleaned out all the tubs and stand up shower before I got home so I wouldn't have to clean it.

I love that he handled the stress of all this in a way that honored God. I think that was great for Eian to see what problem solving and honoring God at the same time look like.

What a guy, you ROCK Honey!